


Mabari in the Keep

by lilnaugrim



Series: Winged Thedas [6]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Big Decisions, Dorian Dreams, M/M, Mabari, winged people
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-14 04:55:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11200881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilnaugrim/pseuds/lilnaugrim
Summary: Cullen is burdened with news from his lover and a new companion.





	Mabari in the Keep

                Cullen sat at his desk as he rubbed his temple. It wasn’t a Lyrium headache; it’d been long since he had one and he had Dorian to thank for that. It’d been quite a few weeks since there was even a sign of a Lyrium headache. This headache was from the reports and paperwork that he had to fill out to rectify the damage done to the Queen Rebel camp in the Hinterlands. The damage was from the Inquisitor and his party; they had gone to face the dragon and ended up leading her straight to the camp when they fled. Soldiers and nearby people had complained about the momentary wild fire that spread out of control and nearly spread to Redcliffe. Thankfully, the mages were able to quench the flames in time and restore order. The Commander groaned at the pile of pages he still had left. A knock at his door made him look up from his desk as the door opened.

“Commander?” Cassandra looked in from the open door.

“Yes?” he replied, standing to greet her. “What is it?” he asked. She smiled at him and beckoned him out.

“Come with me, I have something to show you.” He looked at her warily but forewent his paperwork and moved to the door to grab his cloak. The sun was shining today, it melted most of the snow off the keep but the surrounding mountains retained their snowy blankets. Cullen gave a moment’s shiver under his cloak as he stepped out from his warm office. He blamed Dorian for his new enjoyment of heat. “It’s really more of a favor to ask, you are the only one around here who might be able to do this,” she went on, leading him down the battlement and stairs to get to the barn.

“What exactly is this favor?” he asked, suspicious.

“You’ll see when we get there. I do wish that you keep an open mind Commander and remember that this is only a temporary situation,” she informed him. He was even more suspicious now but attempted to do as she asked. She led him to the barn where some people had gathered around one of the stalls. He furrowed his brow, there seemed to be no horse in the stall unless she was lying on the ground.

“What is this?” he asked.

“We found her wandering the woods and we had hoped…” she looked to him, “that you would keep her for now,” she explained as he went to the people. Suddenly they all jumped away when a vicious looking Mabari jumped at them. She was stopped with a magical cage. She growled even more when she saw Cullen and snapped her jaw as she laid her ears back.

“Uh…that’s a Mabari,” he looked to Cassandra. “A _Grey Warden_ Mabari!” he exclaimed, worried.

“Yes, we know,” Cassandra came up next to him.

“I don’t have any experience with Mabari, why do you think I’m best suited for this?” he asked her. He looked back to the Mabari who huffed at him and went to lie back down once more. She stared at him though, unmoving and creepy.

“You have a way with animals, we all know this,” she told him. “She would be useful for you as well if she so chose to bond with you.”

“What about Blackwall? He’s a Grey Warden, doesn’t he know about this stuff?” he asked, desperate to not take this dog on, not right now. He always had fantasies about owning a Mabari in the future, but that was for the future. There was no way he could juggle the war effort, Dorian, and a dog! Especially a Grey Warden Mabari. The fancy Orlisian Mabari were different, they were still large and extremely intelligent but they lacked the pure ferocity of a Grey Warden Mabari. The Grey Warden ones were meant for hunting and killing off Dark Spawn, not rolling around on the floor showing off its belly to strangers for pettings.

“We’ve already asked him but the dog will not bond with him for whatever reason,” she shrugged as she folded her arms to look at the dog.

“And what makes you think she’ll take me?” he asked.

“She’s got your personality,” Cassandra smirked.

“Hey! I don’t go snapping at random people!” he exclaimed forcefully to her. He stopped when he realized he’d just snapped at her. He sighed and looked down to the dog who was still staring at him. “Dorian isn’t going to like this,” he grumbled.

“He doesn’t have to,” Cassandra smiled. “Once we find out where all the Grey Warden’s went, we can give her back to them to handle where she can do her job. But for now, we’ll keep her safe here,” she motioned to the stable.

“Alright,” he agreed. He was a sucker for animals and he couldn’t help to think that maybe he did have a connection with her.

                Everything Cullen thought he knew about Mabari training and bonding was completely wrong. His gut feeling was so, so wrong too. The Mabari nearly bit his wing in two when he had her in another small magic pen, trying to bond with her. He flapped out of the way in time and she hit the fence barrier.

“Hey! I’m just trying to help you!” he growled at her. His wings and tail were spread in case he needed flight from her again. She growled at him and snapped her jaw again before shaking her head. “Yeah, I get it, you’re a strong lady who doesn’t need help from the likes of me. Well guess what, you’re stuck with me alright?” he argued with her. She snorted and folded her pointed ears back again before she bared her teeth. “Do you want to go back into that stable? Because that’s where you’re going to go if you don’t behave yourself, do you understand me?” he threatened her. “And I won’t feed you either, not until you learn some manners,” he huffed. She leapt at him again and he dodged once more. “That’s it, back in the stable you go,” he gave the que to the mage helping him. The mage changed the pen to allow him exit while he corralled the Mabari back into the stable where he sealed the gate. The Mabari howled in protest.

“You are not getting out of this cage until I know that you won’t go biting off everyone’s face. We aren’t the enemy here,” he shook his head as he spoke to her. “You remember Dark Spawn right? You must have faced some while you were out there,” he asked her. At the mention, she began to growl deeply and low. “Yeah, those are the enemy and the Tevinter soldiers and Venatori. We’re the good guys trying to restore peace. You like peace, right?” he asked. She snorted at him and turned her back. “Ah, so you are like me then, don’t know what to do with yourself outside of battle. Well, that’s one thing we have in common,” he told her. She glanced back to him but she didn’t growl.

“Darling! There you are!” Dorian’s voice rang out from his left. Cullen looked up and attempted a smile to his boyfriend. “You look exhausted,” he came closer. Cullen sighed and looked back to the dog as Dorian came nearer. “Why don’t you and I—ugh! What is that?” Dorian caught sight of the dog. The Mabari turned her head to growl at the mage, snarling and spitting.

“Hey, be nice to him, he’s a friend,” Cullen scolded her. She snorted at him again and turned back around to lie down facing away from the two. “This is a Mabari we found wandering around and for some reason, Cassandra seems to think that I’m the best match for her,” he explained to Dorian who stood next to him looking at the dog with disdain.

“Well she certainly doesn’t have any manners, is she even house broken?” the mage asked, huffing at the dog who clearly didn’t like him.

“Not likely. She’s trained to kill,” Cullen told him with a sigh. “She’s a Grey Warden’s dog—“

“Great! Blackwall can take her! Come on!” Dorian began to pull at Cullen’s arm to take him away.

“She doesn’t like Blackwall,” Cullen stayed put.

“Darling, you can’t seriously believe that you can help her, can you?” the mage looked to him with wonder. Cullen was looking at the dog before he reached up to rub at his neck.

“I…” he started before he looked to Dorian, “I don’t know,” he shook his head. “We are kind of similar in personality and that’s one of the first steps to bonding with her. But…she clearly doesn’t like me either and doesn’t respond well,” he folded his arms.

“Then don’t take the responsibility,” Dorian shrugged. “You have far too much to do to be watching after some dumb dog—“

“She is _not_ dumb!” Cullen growled at his boyfriend. Dorian looked at him and observed for a moment. “Mabari, especially Grey Warden Mabari are among the smartest creatures on this planet. She deserves more respect from you than you’re giving,” he informed him. Dorian simply looked at him and blinked a few times.

“Cassandra was correct, you and the dog do share a personality,” he huffed and shook his head. “When you’re done rolling in the mud with your new companion, I’ll be in my library being a civil person.” Dorian turned away from him to jump into the air and fly towards his nook. Cullen tried to stop him but he didn’t even come close. He sighed and looked down to the dog who was quietly watching him now.

“Yeah, I’m not so great with people either,” he told her. She gave a low woof to him. He looked back to where Dorian had landed in Leliana’s roost and likely traveled down the level to find his own nook to start his studying. He wished he hadn’t defended the dog and gone to rest a while with his boyfriend. His headache still nagged him. “So um…I’ll be back later,” he told her. The dog sat up to turn and look at him, comprehending what he was telling her. “If you um, if you need something…I guess just make a ruckus and someone will come tend to you,” he shrugged. He wished he could bond with the dog but she was adamant that she wouldn’t bond with anyone. “See you pup,” he said to her before he left to return to his own office. He swore he heard a whine but he didn’t listen, he only wanted to rid himself of this headache.

                Two days passed before Dorian forgave him for his lash out back at the stables. The two slept together peacefully after a long session of heated and passionate sex. It always wore Cullen right out, enough that he could sleep very well until the morning. He’d wake and attempt to let Dorian continue sleeping as he got up to stretch and use the chamber pot. Sometimes he’d wake his mage by accident and the man would grumble at him, turn towards him and hold onto him so he couldn’t leave the nest just yet. At least, not without some serious persuasion. This morning, Dorian was awake first and sitting up in the nest.

“Darling?” Cullen asked, his voice husky from sleep. Dorian looked down to him and smiled.

“Good morning amatus,” he laid next to him gently before he kissed Cullen’s lips tenderly. “You slept well, hm?” he smiled at his sleepy Commander.

“Like a rock,” Cullen agreed, closing his eyes once more. Dorian settled near him again and let the Commander rest for a while. Cullen still wondered why exactly Dorian was awake first, it was very unusual. “You’re up early,” he noted. Dorian gave a yawn and cuddled back into the pillows to sigh.

“Earlier than I wanted to be. I guess my body is still whirring from last night,” he shrugged.

“Hm, really?” Cullen peeked an eye open to smirk at his boyfriend. Dorian looked to him and smiled. “Would you like to do something about that?” he asked. He inched his fingers to Dorian’s face where he tapped his lips gently. Dorian smiled at the act and puckered his lips to kiss the finger pad. He sighed and looked to Cullen with his lack of enthusiasm. “Are you alright?” Cullen asked, pushing himself up to lean on his elbow to look at his boyfriend.

“I’m fine,” Dorian shrugged. “It was just some strange dreams is all,” he cuddled into his pillows.

“I thought you didn’t really dream anymore?” Cullen asked.

“I don’t have nightmares, but I still dream,” he replied.

“Oh.” Cullen wasn’t sure how exactly to take this. He knew all dreams weren’t bad or nightmare quality but he knew that some dreams still messed with a person. He wondered what kind of dreams Dorian had. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Oh,” Cullen said quietly again. He waited for Dorian to speak.

“Don’t worry amatus, they are not bad dreams. Just…different is all,” Dorian tried to reassure him. He looked at Cullen and smiled, his eyes wandered to the white wings on his back and then to his hair. “I swear your hair is even lighter,” he chuckled and reached out a hand to push his fingers through the blonde locks. Cullen smiled and let the mage do as he wished. It’d been a few weeks since Dorian had first seen Cullen’s wings change. Since then, the mage had ceased to ogle over them and praise his metamorphosis. Every chance he could, the Vint was all too happy to simply sit and look at the Commander’s new white feathers. There was barely a trace of his old colors left, instead, some black was scattered through the feathers but white dominated.

“Would you like to find some breakfast with me?” Cullen asked him when the mage was done petting him.

“I would but I have far too much on my plate now. I need to start my research as soon as I can,” Dorian sighed and sat up once more. Cullen followed him but scooted near him so he could rest his chin on the mage’s shoulder and cuddle to his side. “Darling, not now, I’m not in the mood,” he shrugged Cullen off him and went to stand up.

“I’m…sorry Dorian,” Cullen sat at the edge of the nest as he watched his boyfriend start to dress himself. Dorian caught the look of guilt on his partner and sighed.

“It’s not anything to do with you Cullen. I’m sorry I’m irritable this morning but I have some things to think about. I promise I’ll be back around for lunch, alright?” he explained himself as he buckled his belt to his breeches.

“Okay,” Cullen agreed. He didn’t like to push Dorian when he was this way, he’d let the mage work out his own problems. He would do his best to remain supportive to his boyfriend.

“Come here,” Dorian bent down to push his lips against Cullen’s when he was finally dressed. “I love you,” he told him quietly. The first time since the snowy day on the bridge. Cullen smirked and then smiled at him.

“Love you too darling,” he nodded. Dorian kissed his forehead before he left to his library nook. Cullen sighed and looked around, wondering what he could do. He figured he ought to dress himself in case a messenger or recruit came to him which was highly likely at this point. He grumbled to himself about dressing at this time of the morning. He finished making himself presentable and descended to his office below to try to finish out some of the leftover paperwork. As soon as he sat down, someone knocked at his door.

“Ugh, come in,” he said. The door opened to find one of the recruits set to guard the Mabari. “Yes, what is it?” he asked.

“The dog is making a ruckus, we think you should come down and try to help her,” the young man said. Cullen grumbled under his breath but stood up all the same to follow the man to the stables. He crossed his arms when he found the Mabari to be in a seemed rampage.

“What in Andraste’s name is going on here?!” Cullen yelled at her. The dog stopped running into the cage walls and growled at him. “Don’t you take that tone with me, lady,” he warned her. She huffed at him and sat down. “Now what is your problem?” he asked. She started to whine and sat up on her back haunches and went into a begging position. “Well,” he started to smile to her. “Looks like you’ve learned some manners then? Are you hungry?” he asked her. She whined and nodded her head. “Will you hurt anyone if I take you out?” he asked her. She resumed her normal sitting position before grumbling to him and lowering her head. He turned to the recruit. “Do we have any food we can spare for her?” he asked.

“I’m sorry Commander, we’re under tight rations at the moment. The Inquisitor has ordered the hunters out for food but it’s in short supply at the moment,” the recruit shook his head.

“Since when?” he asked.

“This morning.” Cullen looked back to the dog who was listening to them intently. He looked at her and she tilted her head to him; catching her eye. She could tell that he was planning something.

“Fetch the mage and tell Altus Pavus I’ll be out for the day,” he ordered the recruit. The young man left with a simple ‘yes ser’ and scampered off. The Mabari stood up to look at him as he leaned against the stable gate. “I can’t leave you to simply starve to death. I know you don’t trust me yet and I understand it probably wasn’t easy for you. I mean, if you’re here with me then you must have lost your partner then, didn’t you?” he asked. The Mabari quickly folded her ears back and bowed her head as she whined. “I’m sorry,” he told her. “I’ve…lost people along the way too and I have someone now that I can’t imagine ever living without. You’ve been through a lot and I just want to make sure you’re safe okay? And then, just maybe, we’ll find your old master,” he told her. She looked up at him, the sadness in her eyes was heartbreaking. “So if you just behave for a few weeks, we’ll get you back. Is that a deal?” he asked her. She stood up and gave her nub of a tail a wag even though she kept her head down.

“What’s this about you leaving for the day?” Dorian flew down to him. The sudden intrusion frightened the Mabari and she jumped backwards to growl at him. “Oh hush you, I’m not here for you,” he told her off.

“Be nice to the little lady Dorian,” Cullen shook his head as he accepted the mage’s arms around him. “I’m taking her out to find some food. Apparently we’re in a shortage right now and none can be spared for her,” he explained.

“Yes, I noticed that when I went to grab something from the kitchen. I don’t believe I’ve ever seen it so barren,” Dorian huffed. “So…” he looked to the dog. “Going to spend all your free time with her now?” he asked bitterly.

“Well, I didn’t think you’d mind since you rushed out earlier,” Cullen told him. Dorian frowned at the response.

“I had my reasons Cullen, just because I was not in the mood for sex doesn’t mean I don’t care to spend any time with you,” he growled in return. “I was planning on a hearty lunch but I see you’ve made other plans,” he took himself away from the Commander to fold his arms.

“We might be back for lunch Dorian,” Cullen rolled his eyes. “Stop acting like the world revolves around you, it doesn’t, okay? I have other obligations besides you, you know!” he replied in equal aggressiveness. “You might have been all high and mighty in Tevinter but in Orlais and Fereldan, you’re nothing,” he growled. He’d regret this, he knew it. Dorian scoffed at him.

“You dare insult me Commander?” Dorian snapped at him.

“Yes, I dare!” Cullen snarled. “You never cared about the low and poorly people like my family. The only reason you like me is because I have pretty wings!” a low blow to Dorian and himself but he didn’t care.

“You _assume_!” Dorian retorted in an angry huff. “You don’t know how life is in Tevinter, don’t you dare tell me what I do and don’t care about!” he yelled. “I happen to care a lot I’ll have you know!”

“Yeah? Is that so?” Cullen scowled. “You wouldn’t even make it back to Tevinter alive if you left on your own. My name might not hold a lot but at least I can hold my own—“

“Not without your Lyrium!”

“Want to make a bet?” Cullen growled. Dorian had lightening swirling around him already; prepared to fight. The Mabari quickly slammed into the gate front and spooked the both of them. Dorian’s lightening accidentally struck Cullen in the chest; sending him to his ass.

“Cullen!” Dorian gasped in shock.

“Get away from me Dorian,” Cullen scooted away from him when the mage tried to help him up. He was angry now and didn’t want to see the mage. The Mabari, sensing Cullen’s hurt, hit the gate one last time with Dorian next to it. The mage jumped way from the gate but growled at the dog.

“Shut up you stupid dog!” Dorian yelled at it and zapped her too. The dog yelped but growled even louder.

“Get away from her!” Cullen was up in an instant; ready to chase the Vint off.

“Fuck off Rutherford,” Dorian spat at him and left the two. Cullen was breathing heavy at the exertion of getting up so quickly and probably because of the lightning strike too. He rubbed at his chest to find it aching terribly. He looked down to his dog and sighed.

“Are you alright?” he asked. She lifted her head and wagged her tail; she’d taken worse than that before. She huffed and tilted her head at him with her question. He sighed and leaned against the stable door. “Yeah, that’s the one that I can’t imagine living life without…” he told her solemnly.

                The mage soon arrived to lift the cage from the stable tentatively. Cullen told him the plan to take her out hunting for the day to see if they could get any food. The mage said she’d likely run away, Cullen looked to her and shrugged, she might or she might not. Cullen was ready to accept that responsibility. He had his horse fetched and readied as he stood with the huge Mabari in the middle of the yard. He was tentative to be around her so freely after she’d attacked on the first day, but he felt like she was more trusting now. She waited patiently as he mounted his horse and then followed him through the Keep and out into the wilds.

                Cullen was quiet for the first part of the ride, he made sure she was following him or near him but he didn’t speak to her. He’d never really fought with Dorian before. There had been little spats here and there but nothing really struck home. Dorian accusing him of only wanting sex when they were together, it dug up some old memories that he wanted to forget. He sat there brooding on his horse until the horse stopped when the Mabari tugged on the reigns for him. Cullen was pulled from his trance to look down to her as she released the leather pieces.

“Oh…I’m sorry girl,” he told her as he dismounted his horse. She went up to him and gently fit her mouth over his hand to lead him on. He dropped the reigns on his horse and she let go when he willingly followed her. She crouched down and inched forward when they hit the edge of a clearing. “Oh,” he said quietly when he saw what she saw. A herd of ram grazing. The Mabari got up to nose at his bow and arrow he’d brought along with him. “Thanks, I know how to hunt,” he scoffed at her. “But it has been a while, I’m not sure if my marksmanship skills have lingered or not,” he sighed. “If I go for one, I’m going to need you to run it down fast, can you do that?” he asked her. She huffed at him just as he’d scoffed at her. He smiled and nodded. He observed the herd and decided to pick off one of the bigger male rams. “Here goes nothing,” he notched his arrow and took a steady stance to aim at the animal grazing.

                The arrow flew straight and quick after it was released from its hold. As soon as it landed in the ram’s neck, the Mabari bolted out to tackle the animal to the ground and finish it off. Cullen smiled and led his horse out to the opening after all the other ram had left the area.

“Good job girl, that was practically too easy, wasn’t it?” he patted the dog happily before he stepped on the neck to pull his arrow from the ram. “Go ahead, eat to your stomachs fill,” he motioned to the animal. Her tail wagged hard as she delved into the animal. Cullen grimaced at the stench and moved away a bit to sit on the dead grass and wait for her.

“I’ve never fought with Dorian before,” he decided that he should talk with her. She perked up to him and glanced to let him know that she was listening before she went back to devouring the hot meat. “I mean…we’ve argued before but it’s always over little things. This honestly wasn’t even a big argument…but it doesn’t feel good. I don’t feel good,” he twiddled with the arrow in his hand as he cleaned it of the blood. It was still a viable arrow. “I hated what I said to him and I knew the moment that I said it, that I’d regret it. But…I did and he did.” Cullen looked down to his tunic where the lightning had struck a hole through. He took down the first couple buttons to look at his chest to see a black mark on it. His heart fluttered angrily at the electrifying feeling running through him. “I…can’t believe that he hurt you too and I’m sorry. He’s never lashed out like that before,” he was saddened when he recalled the angry look on Dorian’s face.

“I know he’s just jealous of you and…I think he might be afraid of dogs too but…that gives him no right to have hurt you,” he growled and threw the arrow down on the ground. The Mabari looked to him as she licked her muzzle of the blood and trotted over to him to sit in front of him. Even sitting, the dog still towered over him. She leaned forward to sniff at his scorched tunic and then up to lick his cheek once. She laid down and laid her head on his lap. “Thanks,” he told her and started to pet her. Maybe having her around wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

“He’s been having some strange dreams I guess. Before I came along, he had terrible nightmares. I guess he’d wake up screaming but since he’s slept with me, he hasn’t had a nightmare yet. I didn’t even think about having other dreams. Some dreams are…they aren’t nightmares but they still leave you breathless and they leave you thinking. I think those are the kind of dreams he’s having now,” he spoke to her as she allowed him to pet her and she listened. “But he wouldn’t tell me about them, he wouldn’t talk this morning. He, himself, insinuated that he was up early because his body was still invigorated from the sex we had that night!” he exclaimed, nearly embarrassed for speaking so freely with this dog. The Mabari lifted her head to tilt it to the side and then the other side as she looked at him. “Sorry, that was probably too much information. But regardless, I thought he was interested in continuing what we’d fallen asleep doing. I guess I read him wrong and he kind of became sore. He left soon after and that was that. And then you saw how he reacted to us spending time together,” he sighed. The dog huffed at him at the end and licked her chops. “Now…I’m not really sure what I should do. Do I go and apologize to him first?” he asked. The Mabari quickly got up and gave a light growl as she shook her head and then the rest of her body. “Probably not, hm?” he asked, he reached his hand over his scorch mark again to feel the hurt.

“We can take the carcass home if you like,” he offered her. He’d brought along some ropes and a canvas for easy dragging. She huffed and shook her head again. “Well, what do you want to do with it?” he asked. She went back over to start eating again. “Alright.”

                Cullen laid down on the dead grass to look up to the sky. His horse was to the side grazing on what he could. There were white fluffy clouds floating above him and he had to take the moment to appreciate. It was a rarity that he enjoyed a moment like this and he intended to savor it. He had to wonder how many reports were piling up on his desk though and he sighed. It would be hell when he got back but it was worth it for the moment.

                The Commander ended up spending most of the day out with his new Mabari friend. She had nearly picked the Ram clean and left only bones to be scavenged upon. Cullen had no idea she could even eat that much, he wondered how he was going to feed her with the lack of food at the moment. They both decided to hunt another two or three ram to bring home. They picked off the smaller three so his horse could pull the weight enough. It was getting to be dark by the time Cullen led horse and Mabari back home.

“Here you go girl, your own little stockpile,” he chuckled when he set the ram in her stall at the back corner. The Mabari was quick to lick his face when she could reach it. “Hey, stop that. Dorian has to kiss me you know,” he chuckled and patted her head. “Alright, I’ll be by in the morning to see how you’re doing,” he told her. She gave him a nod and settled down to sleep for a while. Cullen left her and flew up to his office. He stretched out his wings once and shook his feathers before he entered.

                Cullen grumbled at the paperwork, there wasn’t as much as he’d expected there be but it was still enough that he’d have to spend the next few hours going through it. He began to notice that something was different. He furrowed his brow as he looked around, his fire was lit thankfully but that wasn’t what it was. He heard a creak of wood upstairs and wondered if Dorian had forgiven him.

“Dorian?” he called up before he went to the ladder to jump up. He stopped himself when he saw Dorian and realized what was different. “What are you doing?” he asked. All of Dorian’s things were now gone from his roost. Dorian had only the rest of his pillows in his arms and was ready to fly away. “What…what are you…?” Cullen frowned at the sight.

“I’m leaving,” Dorian told him and went to move to the hole in the roof. Cullen’s heart sank low into his stomach and churned. He couldn’t have heard that correctly.

“What in Thedas for?” he asked, advancing a few steps. “So we had a little fight this morning, we can move past that, right?” he asked.

“This is not what that is about!” Dorian snapped at him. “I mean, it is but…there is more that you simply don’t understand!” he seemed to be regretting his decision. Cullen could see the hurt and pain in his expression but it didn’t give him a clue as to what was happening.

“Then talk to me Dorian, don’t leave me here stranded!” he advanced a few more steps and Dorian flinched. “What is going on with you?” he had to ask. He wasn’t sure whether to be upset or angry.

“I told you, this isn’t working and…I’m sorry—“

“Bullshit you are!” Cullen turned angry at the shit answer. Dorian flinched back again, closer to the hole in the roof. “Why won’t you talk to me? You didn’t talk this morning and then you ran off. I went to care for my Mabari and you fucking hit us with lightning? What the hell is wrong with you Dorian?” he resorted to swearing. He was too angry now. He’d never hurt Dorian over it, but he was sure that his angry expression made it look so.

“Just leave me alone Rutherford!” Dorian snarled back at him and finally jumped through the roof to fly away. Cullen stood there staring at the hole. His mouth gaped as he tried to comprehend what had just happened. There is no way Dorian could break up with him, after so long and so much shared between the two of them! Anger was replaced with anguish as he turned his head away. His nest looked empty now. He placed a hand over the scorch mark and wondered what to do. Could Rengar help? No, he didn’t want the Inquisitor to be swirled up in his mess. He had to find a way to fix this. But first, he headed to the tavern for a drink or five.

                Blackwall drank with the Commander and they talked things over while Cullen became drunk off his ass. Blackwall listened as Cullen sobbed with the recent news at the edge of the bar. The tavern was full that night, Iron Bull and Krem sitting in the corner as usual. The bard was singing happy tunes.

“You know whose fault it is?” Blackwall slurred, just as drunk as Cullen. Cullen looked up with the question and shook his head. “It’s that bitch, she’s bad luck,” he was talking about the Mabari.

“Nah, she’s a good girl,” Cullen shook her head.

“Think about it though! How many times did you and Dorian get it on since she arrived?” he asked the personal question. Cullen grumbled and shook his head.

“Once,” he answered.

“There you go! It’s the bitch’s fault!” Blackwall patted his back roughly. Cullen began to think about the Mabari. The more time he’d spent with her, the more he pushed Dorian away.

                Cullen didn’t dare fly while he was drunk; he knew that would end badly. Instead, he staggered away from the tavern and down towards the barn. He was angry again but this time, his anger was directed at a different target. He had to grab onto the barn’s door when he nearly fell over, his world was spinning but he felt elated at the same time. With a push off the frame, he nearly fell into the fire but managed to make it to the stable door where he opened it. The Mabari picked up her head and wagged her tail at him before she smelled his drunken disposition.

“It’s all _your_ fault!” he accused her angrily. She tucked her ears back at the accusation and tilted her head to the side trying to comprehend what he was saying to her. “It’s all _your_ fault this happened!” he marched in, ready to hit her. She quickly backed into the corner and cowered in front of him. The anguish appeared again when he realized what he was going to do. “It’s all _my_ fault!” he breathed out before he fell to his knees. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he shook his head and crawled to the corner near the stable door. “I’m sorry,” he repeated as he shed his tears. He felt awful for this, awful for going to hit his new friend. His heart hurt and stung him as he sat there and cried. “He left me,” he explained to his dog who was confused. “He said we’re over, he can’t be with me!” he turned his head to face the corner; ashamed of his tears. He felt the nose of his Mabari first before she tried to crawl into his embrace. Being that she was a two hundred and fifteen pound dog at four feet tall, it was more like a bear hug. She was able to maneuver his legs so she fit between them and then laid her giant head on his stomach with his incline. His tears did not stop with her act and so she stood to start licking his face; understanding that this usually made people happy. Cullen only extracted himself and huddled more into the corner. “I love him,” he whimpered, pathetic. The Mabari whined with him and curled around him to keep him in the corner to prevent him from doing something stupid and to help him feel safe. Cullen passed out on himself.

                The Mabari woke in the middle of the night, something wasn’t right. Cullen was still passed out and sleeping against her now. She could sense the sorrow and she heard the scream. Without waking her new master she slid out from under him and jumped the gate. Through the yard and to the castle where she barreled through the kitchen staff already hard at work. Down through the corridors, she paused a moment to sniff the air and find the terror. Down more halls and finally to a door that was barely cracked. She listened for the whimpers of a man in tears. She nosed the door open gently to find Dorian holding himself on the floor. It seemed as though the mage had fallen from his nest. The Mabari sniffed near him gently as Dorian failed to see her just yet. She knew his terror for her and didn’t intend on scaring him but the mage was already on edge. She sniffed at his outstretched wing and he jumped backwards blindly to be away from her. She was quick to grab his night tunic to spare him from the fire he was about to back into.

“Get away from me!” he yelled at her. She was able to pull him more towards the nest before she let go, he was safe again. “Get the hell away from me!” he growled and swatted at her again. She whined to him in attempts to convey that she was a friend. She was quick to lie down and place her head on his knee. Dorian seemed to calm with her actions, he was still a mess and still crying.

“I hurt him, didn’t I?” he asked the dog. She picked up her head to start licking at his knee and bare skin. “I don’t know what I can say to him, I don’t know how to do this,” he sobbed. When she felt he was comfortable with her presence, she scooted up more to lay her head on his stomach and watch him. “I have to go and I know he can’t come with me!” he confessed to her. She perked her head up instead and tilted it to the side, what did he mean? This didn’t sound like a normal breakup line. She stood up so she could lick at his face. His hand was hiding his eyes but she was able to reach his salted cheeks, lips, chin, and neck.

“No, no, no, stop, please,” Dorian tried to push her away. She gave a little woof to him and tilted her head again. He looked at her this time as she kept tilting her head one way and then the other way. “I have to go back to Tevinter,” he looked away from her and stilled himself. “I don’t know how to tell him,” he shook his head lightly. “I…I had a nightmare,” he looked back to her. “He stops them, the nightmares. It’s partly why we work so well, he…he helps me and I help him but…but now I’ve ruined everything, haven’t I?” he asked her. She gave a brief nod of her head before shaking her fur. She gently fit her mouth around his hand and tugged on him to try to get him to move. “No, I don’t want to see him,” he shook his head. She let go and huffed at him before she went to his nest to hop in and settle down. “Oh…you want me to…sleep?” he asked as he lifted himself off the ground and crawled towards the nest. She nodded to him again and got up to allow him into the nest. “I don’t sleep well without him,” Dorian climbed in. He was exhausted from fretting over this issue all day. He curled into his lonely pillows that weren’t nearly as fluffy as Cullen’s were. The Mabari jumped back in to lay down with him, protecting him from the night. Dorian wasn’t sure why but he fell back asleep immediately and stayed that way for the rest of the night.

                Cullen woke up with a dry mouth. His eyes hurt and his head stung. He sat up to open his eyes as far as he dared to find out where he was. He groaned with the ache in his head and wiped the dirt off his face from sleeping on the ground. He recognized his Mabari’s stable stall but didn’t see her around. He grumbled and rubbed at his eyes before he dared his attempt to stand. By holding onto walls and other objects, Cullen was able to make his way to his office where he promptly sat down roughly in his chair. He didn’t remember much of what happened towards the end of the night but he recalled the sinking feeling and his Mabari being disappointed with him. He still wondered where she was but he couldn’t get up now and needed to do some resting. He decided that he needed to sleep in his own nest instead. He pushed himself up to climb the ladder and crawl into his nest. He began to cry when he realized that some of the pillows were gone, Dorian’s pillows were gone. He cried himself to sleep.

                Dorian woke warm and comfortable. His heart broke when he knew it wasn’t because Cullen was by his side. He recalled his nightmare and shivered in his warm bedroom air. Something moved at his side, oh yes, Cullen’s Mabari was with him. He sighed as he woke himself and struggled to sit up. The Mabari perked up to look at him; she seemed so concerned for him. It was the same concernment that he’d see in Cullen’s face when he was upset or sad.

“Stop,” he gently pushed her face away before he turned to slip out of his nest. He slowly dressed himself and started to pack his things. He should have done it all yesterday, he knew it but he just couldn’t do it. The Mabari was quick to pick up what he was doing and jumped out of the nest to woof and whine. “I can’t stay, I’m needed back in Tevinter,” he shook his head. “Please, go comfort Cullen. He needs it more than I do,” he tried to shoo her away. She looked at him and his melancholy expression. She whined more before she went up to him to lick at his hand in a friendly gesture. “Please,” he took his hand away and continued packing. She ran out to find where she’d left Cullen.

                The Mabari ran to the stable and was about to hop over the gate but she stopped when she noticed that the gate was open. She sniffed around to find Cullen’s scent there and then followed it towards the stairs and then up. She could still smell the drink on him but she was glad when she was able to open the door to his office. She wagged her tail hopping to find her master but did not spot him. She sniffed to his chair; he’d clearly sat here but had since moved on. She followed the trail to the ladder and looked up where she heard a small cry. It’d been some time since she’d tackled ladders before but she trusted her own ability. First paws up on the rungs and then a hop with her back feet. Paw up and paw up then back feet. She kept up the pattern to climb the ladder and finally scrambled up to the second floor where she found her master asleep in his nest. She decided that he needed a wakeup call and barked as loudly as she could. Cullen yelped and flailed as he bolted from his nest to fall onto his hands and knees.

“What in Andraste?!” he said from the floor as the Mabari came over to lick at his face and neck like she’d done with Dorian. “What are you doing? Stop, please stop!” he pushed her away angrily. “Unless someone is dying, you need to leave me alone,” he growled at her. She paused for a moment and decided that yes, Dorian was dying. She whined and paced and pawed at him to get his attention. “What?” he snapped as he stood up. She grabbed his belt and pulled towards the ladder. “How in the Maker’s name did you get up here?” it suddenly dawned on him that his Mabari had climbed the ladder. “Is someone hurt?” he asked her, finally pushing the sleep off. She nodded and danced around before she raced to the ladder and whined. “Or do you just want to get down?” he asked and folded his arms. She didn’t reply but sat down to stare at him. “So someone is in trouble?” She danced around again and nodded. “Alright, alright,” he grabbed the dog to descend the ladder with carefully. He slung her over his shoulder, well, she practically reached the floor even slung over him but she stayed still as they descended the ladder together.

“Alright, take me to the person,” he nodded to her once they were down on his office level. She ran to the door and he opened it for her. He flew after her as she bolted across the bridge and to the rotunda. Down they went and then to the door that led below to everyone else’s rooms. Cullen felt his heart sink; they were going in the direction of Dorian’s room. He was going to have to suck it up and cross the door in order to get to this hurt person. The Mabari stopped in front of Dorian’s room as Cullen went to go by. “Wait, what are you—agh!” his Mabari full on tackled him through the now open door. Cullen barely saw him before he flattened Dorian on his back and everyone landed with a huff.

“Cullen!” Dorian exclaimed before the Mabari came around to lick both of their faces. They both turned away from her and grumbled before Cullen started to get up.

“I’m sorry,” Cullen started, “she told me someone was hurt and tricked me into coming here,” he stood up and helped his former boyfriend up as well. “Wait…” he looked around, “are you going somewhere?” he asked. The Mabari sat down to watch them. Dorian averted his eyes but kept his pack shouldered.

“I must make haste to Tevinter,” he replied.

“For what purpose?”

“I need to fight for my family and our position in the Magisterium. Father sent word that they are attempting to retire our line because I am here and not present to take his seat,” he explained. Cullen watched him, he wasn’t sure he was comprehending all of this properly. “I have to go and I thought…I thought that it’d be best if…if we weren’t…” Dorian kept his head down. He was ashamed of himself, even when he broke off past night flings, he could always look the man in his eye at least once. He couldn’t even make the effort for Cullen and it broke his heart. He was not, however, expecting the hard slap to his cheek.

“I…I’m sorry—“ Cullen started when Dorian held his stinging cheek.

“No, I deserved it,” he shook his head.

“Maker damn you Dorian, you thought because you had to take a trip to Tevinter that we couldn’t still be together?” he asked.

“It’s more than a trip Cullen; I may have to stay there if I take his seat!” Dorian finally looked to him and took his hand away.

“Then I’m coming with you,” Cullen said.

“No, you can’t,” Dorian shook his head.

“Why not?” Cullen folded his arms to glare at his friend.

“Because if they know that I have a boyfriend and not a wife at this point, they will terminate our seat. I cannot risk that for my father,” he began to pace around in place of looking at the dog or his friend. “I risked it once before and I left and now look at what trouble I put him in! I have the power to change things Cullen, to change Tevinter for the good. There are others who see it like I do, others that agree with how I feel and how the Inquisition feels. I cannot pass this up and I cannot…I cannot be seen with you,” Dorian stopped with his back to the Commander. He’d set his pack down as he paced.

“Then let me be your escort to Tevinter at least. I can’t bear to think if…if anything happened to you on your way,” Cullen stood resound. His heart was still breaking into tiny bits, what happened to him if Dorian had to stay?

“Cullen…” Dorian covered his face again; he didn’t know what to do. “You can’t abandon your post here because of me. Rengar has given me proper people to fly with.”

“I will not let you go without me.”

“You have to!” Dorian turned to yell at him. “Please,” he felt the tears prickling his eyes. He could see the heartbreak in Cullen’s face but he was determined. He watched as Cullen approached him and without a word, he kissed him. Dorian had never felt such a passion between them, they were going to be apart for who knows how long, maybe forever. He threw his arms around his lover and kissed him deeply. Cullen held him tightly, he was afraid for his boyfriend and rightfully so. When he released the lips that he’d captured for his own, he kissed the cheek in which a tear had slid down. Dorian cried and pulled Cullen close to hug him dearly. “I hate this, I hate it so much,” he cried against his lover. Cullen had his own tears racing down his cheeks as he held onto Dorian as long as he could. Cullen played with his hair and started to kiss his neck. Dorian reaffirmed his hold and buried his face into the nape of Cullen’s neck.

“What did Rengar say?”

“Nothing, just dismissed me.”

“Did he give you permission or…did he just…send you away?” Cullen asked. If the Inquisitor dismissed him, he likely didn’t have all the information he needed.

“Not…exactly. But he wouldn’t let me leave if he knew everything, you know this.”

“So you didn’t tell him what’s going on?” Cullen pulled from the mage.

“No,” Dorian wouldn’t look at him.

“Come on,” Cullen grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the door.

“Cullen! I can’t! I have to leave!” Dorian tried to defy him. Cullen had a grip of iron and the mage couldn’t struggle out of it. The Mabari was quick to follow them and nipped at Dorian’s feathers to keep him from struggling so much. “Hey! Get your Mabari off me!” he exclaimed as he was pulled along.

“She’s doing what I asked her to do,” Cullen looked back to see the girl following them still.

“Cullen, I already told you that you can’t come with me. Speaking to Rengar isn’t going to change anything!” he struggled more but had to stop when the Mabari nipped him again and growled lowly.

                Cullen dragged the mage up to Rengar’s quarters when he found out where the Inquisitor was hiding. Up the stairs and into the room to find Rengar sitting at his desk writing out letters. He smiled at the pair when he saw them and the Mabari.

“I see she’s taken a liking to you Commander,” Rengar stood to greet them.

“Yes, that’s fine but that’s not what I’m here to talk about,” Cullen released Dorian when Rengar joined their circle. The Mabari watched the exits in case Dorian had a want to flee. He didn’t have his pack with him and so it would be foolish to do so. “Do you have a moment?”

“Anything for my finest Commander,” Rengar nodded.

“Did you know that Dorian was planning on leaving?” he asked bluntly. Dorian shifted on his feet and wouldn’t look at the men as they spoke.

“He came to me about a small trip he wanted to take and I granted it and dismissed him,” Rengar nodded.

“Did you also know that this trip is to Tevinter and it might be more than just a ‘little’ trip?” he asked.

“To Tevinter?!” Rengar tilted his head and looked to Dorian. “No…there was no mention of that. Why Tevinter, Dorian?” Cullen waited a moment to see if the mage would explain himself, when he did not speak up, Cullen filled in for him. He explained that Dorian’s family linage was in trouble because he was not present. His father had recently sent a summons for his son to return to help restore the Magisterium’s faith in the Pavus line. He also explained how Dorian may have to stay forever if he took over his father’s seat. At the mention, he choked up but took a moment to compose himself before he finished the story.

“Dorian, why did you not tell me of this?” Rengar folded his arms.

“I don’t want to stay there but if I have to…I can do a lot more good there than I can being here,” he glanced to the Inquisitor.

“I have requested to go with him,” Cullen told him. “If…it so happens that he stays, I can return but I must see him safely to Tevinter first. Cassandra can take over the reports as she’s helped me in the past and Blackwall can help with the troops which he already does,” he did his best to convince the Inquisitor.

“I have requested that Cullen stay, I can make the journey on my own and have done so in the past—“

“Not when Corypheus has been lurking. You came here before the Conclave explosion—“

“I can take care of myself!” Dorian growled at him. Cullen stayed quiet, he knew the mage could. Dorian was very capable and he knew his limits and when to flee but he couldn’t help his need to protect. “Darling, I know you want to come with me, trust me, I want you there too but my father…when he sees you with me…it won’t end well for any of us,” he shook his head.

“Then we can pretend to not be together, we’ve already accomplished that last night,” Cullen folded his arms and scowled at his friend.

“Fuck off Rutherford, I said you’re not—“

“The Commander will accompany you on your journey and return within a week of arrival if by then nothing has been decided with the fate of your line, Dorian,” Rengar interrupted them. “Cullen, you will act only as his escort and protector whilst you are there. Do you two understand me?” he asked.

“But—“

“I said,” Rengar looked at Dorian, “do you understand me?” he asked firmly.

“Yes Inquisitor,” Dorian nodded. Cullen smiled and thanked Rengar before he called for his Mabari to follow again as he led Dorian back down. They descended the stairs and Cullen stopped him before they opened the door.

“I don’t fully understand why you don’t want me to come along but I will do everything you tell me to do when we are in Tevinter to maintain secrecy,” Cullen spoke. “I won’t put your line in danger, alright?” he asked. Dorian looked to him, his eyes misted and he leaned forward to plop himself into Cullen; he planted his face into his chest to cry.

“I just don’t want to go in the first place,” he started his explanation. “I don’t want to see my father, I don’t want to go to Tevinter, I don’t want his stupid seat. But…if I don’t go, I lose all my credibility,” he sobbed. Cullen took a moment to realize what was going on here and why Dorian had been so on edge the last few days.

“Oh,” he let out the small syllable as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. It didn’t occur to him that Dorian didn’t want to go in the first place; he figured he’d be happy to go home. They’d discussed it before, where home was now. Cullen agreed that Skyhold, even though it’d only been eight months of living here, it was their home now. Dorian continued to speak.

“I’ve thought about what happens after the war and I honestly can’t see you joining me in Tevinter where I would take over his seat then. But after this is over, I could have so much more power then. Right now? I am nothing,” he shook his head.

“I’m sorry Dorian,” he held his lover tight against him and let him explain.

“I want to stay here with you now that I’ve found you. Maker, it’s been six months but I love you Cullen and I don’t want to leave you. I didn’t know what to do when I received the summons. I didn’t know how to tell you that I had to go and I thought…” he stopped to just flat out cry. Cullen lifted his head to fit comfortably against his neck again. He held onto Dorian and let him cry. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” he sobbed into Cullen’s tunic. Cullen rubbed his back and kept a hand at the back of Dorian’s head to play with his black hair.

“I’m sorry,” Cullen whispered as he continued to hold his mage. “I love you Dorian,” he kissed his neck gently.

                Dorian eventually settled down enough to sneak away to his room to get his things. Cullen went to his own to pack his bag. He’d ordered his Mabari back to her stable for the moment; he’d give her instructions before they left. He packed a few of his small pillows, perhaps they could sleep together at least once or twice. He donned on his armor and weapons once more. He was just finishing suiting up when Dorian came to his office with his own armor on and staff slung over his back with his pack.

“You ought to name that dog of yours,” Dorian spoke as he came up to help Cullen finish piecing his armor together.

“Why?” Cullen turned himself to allow Dorian to help clip the metal together under his wings.

“Well, are you going to go around all day calling her pup?”

“Is that not okay?”

“It’s not very dignifying. She deserves something special,” Dorian finished with the straps and released himself to stay away so Cullen could put his wings away and turn to him.

“I suppose you’re right, I’ll think about it on the way over,” Cullen nodded. He smiled to his mage and came nearer to capture his jaw in his fingers. He pulled Dorian’s face up gently so he could give him a kiss. Dorian didn’t fight it but he did sigh at the act. Cullen kissed his cheek solidly and took himself away. “Let me just stop by to see the Mabari first and then we’ll go, yes?” he asked. Dorian nodded and followed Cullen to the stables where the girl greeted them happily. “Hey girl!” Cullen smiled at her and gave her pets. She looked to Dorian and moved to him to lick his hand again.

“Stop,” Dorian took his hand away.

“I think she wants you to pet her,” Cullen mused. Dorian groaned and looked down at her with distaste. He reached out to give her head three pats before he folded his arms. The Mabari woofed at him and wagged her stub of a tail happily.

“Alright girl, while we’re gone I want you to listen to the Inquisitor mostly. Blackwall and Cassandra will help you for the next few weeks okay? We’ll be back soon, I promise,” he reached to kiss her temple before he stood up. She wasn’t done giving him affection and quickly jumped up to hug and kiss his face. “Okay, okay, okay!” he laughed at her and set her down. “You behave yourself, understand?” he told her. She woofed and wagged her tail again. “Alright,” he nodded and smiled to Dorian who had been watching them. “Are you ready?” he asked.

“No,” Dorian shook his head before he pinned Cullen against the wall to kiss him forcefully. Cullen let his eyes slide shut and found his hands at Dorian’s lower back as they kissed. Dorian led the way and kissed him with the passion that he could muster. Cullen let his hands go lower to grab at Dorian’s ass. The grab made the mage giggle and smile as he pulled away to lean on his boyfriend. He looked at the Commander and sighed. “I’m sorry that I handled everything so badly,” he spoke. “And I’m sorry that I believed that you couldn’t come with me.”

“You had reason. I do feel like I’m abandoning my post here but you’re far more important to me than my job here. Maybe that isn’t necessarily a good thing for the Inquisition and the world, but everything will keep spinning and working away. Cassandra and Blackwall will both do fine, I guarantee it,” Cullen smiled when his hands slid up to frame Dorian’s face. The mage gladly pushed his head into the Commander’s hands and kissed each of them before he sighed.

“Okay,” he whispered quietly with a bit of a nod and a smile to Cullen. “Let’s go,” he agreed that they were both ready. Cullen smiled and gave a short nod. They pair untangled from each other and exited the barn. One last kiss to Dorian’s cheek and Cullen set off into the sky. How good it felt to stretch his wings once more. Dorian was quick to join him and they set off towards their destination.


End file.
